stay at home dad - Noah's Archipelago - Page 11

Your Responsibility, Daddy

June 12, 2024March 23, 2023 by Pyra Draculea

Playing Chicken

February 5, 2024February 8, 2023 by Pyra Draculea

Noah is giving Valerie her bottle and Frank comes up with a coffee cup and says, "Alright, Agnes went to the salon. What's the intel?" Noah smiles and says, "We can have up to 10 hens. Minimum coop size is 40 square feet, but I think we should make it at least 8x8." Frank smiles and replies, "Plenty of room next to the pool." Noah continues, "And the run should be at least 100 square feet. More is better." Frank says, "Like I said." Noah then says, "In theory we get 10 eggs a day for most of the year." Frank smiles and says, "Let's do it... next month when Agnes goes to Vegas with her sisters." Noah replies, "Roger that." Meanwhile Valerie yanks a lock of Noah's hair and pokes him in the throat. Noah says to Valerie, "Ow! Valerie, don't pull Daddy's hair." Frank then says, "Yeah, that's how I lost mine."

Noah and Frank are plotting to get free eggs… well, free after the cost of the coop, the run, the hens, the feed… Meanwhile, Valerie is practising her assassin moves for when she’s big enough to actually be dangerous.

The Cooking Lesson

February 7, 2024November 7, 2022 by Pyra Draculea

Noah tries, unsuccessfully, to coach Ursula into learning to cook.

In Ursula’s defence, some of us didn’t learn to cook til we were in our 30s.

The Dad Tax

February 7, 2024November 1, 2022 by Pyra Draculea

Ursula comes to Noah looking for candy, only to find Noah's been eating her Halloween haul.

Today’s the day that Ursula learns about taxation. And the Dad Tax is always worse when you question his tales of his own trick-or-treat efforts as a kid.

Robot Research

June 12, 2024October 14, 2022 by Pyra Draculea

Why would Noah want to actually wash the windows when he can spend days researching robots to do it for him?

Noah’s all about conservation… whether that’s water conservation or his own energy remains to be seen.

Noah’s Laundry Blues

June 12, 2024October 12, 2022 by Pyra Draculea

Noah wants to streamline the laundry procress.

Noah seeks to streamline the laundry drudgery, but Ruth won’t let him.

Noah’s Secret Roomba

June 12, 2024October 11, 2022 by Pyra Draculea

Noah's efficiency knows no bounds, ditto his sneakiness.

Noah and Adam discuss how Noah gets all the vacuuming done while still having time to watch his soaps.

The Day After Costco

June 12, 2024October 6, 2022 by Pyra Draculea

Ursula and Noah argue about whether she can have some of that sweet, sweet Costco sugar.

Based on intel from Agnes, Ursula argues for a share of the previous day’s Costco candy haul, but Noah answers to Ruth, not to Agnes.

Bugs as a Love Language

June 12, 2024September 29, 2022 by Pyra Draculea

Noah is teasing Ursula about her classmate who put bugs in her hair.

Do you want bugs in your coffee, Noah? Because this is how you get bugs in your coffee. And your mother-in-law will do it gladly.

Ursula Hates Fractions

June 12, 2024September 27, 2022 by Pyra Draculea

$Ursula refuses to learn fractions, though Noah can think of a couple real-world cases of when they're necessary.$

I suppose Ursula’s not planning to learn to cook either, because I sure have to know quarters and halves to make dinner.