Hey all… time to snoop through Noah’s diary again. Why? Because we can.
Tuesday, December 2, 2025, 11:00am:Christmas is coming! We put up the tree on Sunday and me and Frank got the lights up, boring as can be because Agnes insists on “tasteful” but it’s better than nothing.
And I’ve already had my fruitcakes done and aging and soaking in rum-soaked cheescloth for a couple months now.
Now I’ve moved onto cookie duty, baking up a storm and then freezing them for Christmas. All sorta cookies: Danish butter cookies, of course, and brunkager, aebleskiver, pebber nodder, shortbread, rumballs, gingerbread, snickerdoodles, sugar cookies, iced cookies, chocolate crinkles, linzers, pinwheels, peppermint snowballs, red velvet kisses, candycane twists, deep-fried butterflies, lace cookies, macaroons, thin mints, coconut macadamia, cranberry orange, pfeffernusse… I mean, I’ve only just started but by the time Christmas comes I’ll have ‘em all. And fudge, too.
Today I’m making a few batches of double chocolate almond biscotti, too: the better to give out as Christmas gifts to my bandmates.
Except to Howie, because he complains about any sort of cookie that isn’t chocolate chip. Ugh…
Anyway, Duke is sourcing the ducks for Christmas Eve dinner, so I don’t have to worry about that until the night before. If it’s anything like last year, Adam will practically inhale the first duck all on his own and Duke and I will polish off the second. Ursula will be bribed into 3 bites of duck breast and Ruth will maybe have a bite or two but will stick to the rice pudding and cabbage.
At least Ursula likes red currant jelly… though I have to explain to her that you can’t just live on jelly and cookies but then she insists Ma told her that was OK.
I really wish Ma wouldn’t say that stuff to Ursula, but oh well. It’s Christmas… and it’s just 3 weeks away.
I have a lot of baking to do.
And a lot of Christmas party gigs. The Knotheads mostly do weddings, of course, and we do have wedding gigs every Saturday this month, but we also have Christmas parties to play, ditto my regular cover band. And the local non-profits are keeping my U2 band busy, too… kinda hate those gigs to be honest. I mean, I get that you’re a non-profit, but my band ain’t. Usually Mike handles all the booking and negotiations stuff. Y’know… he comes across like a big teddy bear but he’s been running his screenprinting shop since high school and he’s very good at staying firm on price no matter the guilt trip.
We do give non-profits a 10% discount on our rates but that’s it. Sorry if Karen from accounting has been in love with Bono since 1987: the real Bono won’t show up for free, either. And I am Fun Fake Bono who does not have 3/4 of a billion dollars in my wallet and I gotta put video games in the Nintendo.
You seen what the new Switch 2 costs? Good Lord… And the new Mario Kart is over a hundred bucks.
So… no, Flyswatter is not singing “With Or Without You” for free.
I mean, we’re fortunate. Ruth’s parents have money and we live in the guest house for basically free (just utilities) and Ruth has a decent job and in the last few years I’ve been making way more gigs and steady money and my biggest expenses are summer art camps for Ursula, but still: the bands are a business and we need to cover our expenses.
And I gotta save for Ursula’s education. I mean, she insists she isn’t going to college but I think Ruth’s gonna bully her into at least going to art school for a BFA and that’s pretty expensive now, let alone in 10-15 years.
I keep trying to get her to take an interest in some sort of business. Like, go hang out with Mike at his shop. Mike’s kids are teenagers and they work in the shop part-time after school and on Saturdays. And it is art-related. Maybe Ursula could end up having a business like that or making jewelry or something, but she remains solidly convinced that somehow she’s gonna have a job where she gets paid to just watch cartoons all day.
Well… I guess there’s guys on YouTube who get paid to play video games all day, so maybe she could make something like that happen for cartoon-watching, but it seems like working in a silkscreening shop is a more realistic plan.
But then when I tell her that, she points out her Grandma Agnes doesn’t have a job and it’s kinda hard to argue with that except I don’t see Ursula taking any interest in hanging out at the country club or yacht club where she would be most likely to meet boys from rich families who will grow up to support a wife who just watches cartoons all day.
So… yeah… I’ve been working on a little “art school” savings fund.
And Valerie might go to college, too.
So… yeah… Fun Fake Bono ain’t singing and shaking his butt onstage for free.
