Noah's Archipelago - Noah Thorsen: Rock 'n' Roll House Dad

January 13, 2023: In the Toy Store

January 13, 2023January 13, 2023 by Pyra Draculea

Noah is at the toy store with a few Bono Funko Pops in his shopping cart. He's holding Valerie who is reaching for the Funkos. Noah tells her, "No, Valerie, those are for Mommy's collection. I got you proper teething toys." Valerie continues trying to squirm away and get at the Funkos; Noah pulls her back and says, "No no no. No Funkos for you." Valerie starts screaming. Just then Ursula comes up to Noah with a big smile and a big Lego box, saying, "Daddy! They have the giant Lego Viking ship!" Noah replies, "Not now, Ursula. Maybe for your birthday in June." Ursula growls and grabs Noah's cellphone out of his pocket, then phones Granny Thorsen and tells her, "Granny Thorsen! It's an emergency! We're in the toy store and Daddy won't buy me the Lego Viking ship!" Granny Thorsen replies, "Put the boy on the phone."

Yet another of Noah‘s attempts to teach Valerie and Ursula delayed gratification is thwarted. Share on FacebookPost on XSave

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January 12, 2023: Valerie’s Chew Funko

January 12, 2023January 12, 2023 by Pyra Draculea

Noah is looking under the sofa cushions while Ursula is watching TV. Noah asks, "Ursula, have you seen your mommy's Bono Funko Pop?" Ursula looks over to her right at her baby sister and says, "Valerie's got him." Noah replies, "OK. Don't let her wreck it." Valerie is chewing on the Funko Pop's head with the one tooth she has and has torn the head open. Ursula replies to Noah, "Too late.'

Valerie‘s got a new favorite chew/teething toy… unfortunately it’s her mom‘s favorite Funko Pop: Bono. Looks like a trip to the toy store will be in order to find a replacement. Share on FacebookPost on XSave

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January 11, 2023: Baby Talk

January 12, 2023January 11, 2023 by Pyra Draculea

Ursula is doing her homework at the dining room table and Noah is next to her. He says to her, "So your little friend's getting a new little brother or sister, huh?" Ursula replies, "Yep." Noah continues, "She must be excited." Ursula replies, "Meh." Concerned at Ursula's lack of enthusiasm, Noah asks, "Weren't you excited when we had Valerie?" Ursula rolls her eyes and crosses her arms and says, "She doesn't do anything exciting. She just sleeps and cries." No grins and tells her, "Well, it's hard work being a baby. Don't you remember?" Ursula isn't buying it and says, "No, but it can't be harder than spelling 'transportation.'"

The hard work of being a baby like Valerie: sleep, cry, barf, cry, poop, cry… Share on FacebookPost on XSave

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January 10, 2023: 500 on Facebook

January 12, 2023January 10, 2023 by Pyra Draculea

Ursula is at her desk, drawing and Noah stands behind her, grinning with hands clasped in glee. He says, "Hey, Ursula, we're up to 500 followers on Facebook!" Ursula isn't interested and just says, "Mmm..." Noah says, "Cool, huh?" Ursula replies, "That depends. Are we ordering pizza to celebrate?" Noah answers, "Um... Mommy's still on her New Year's health food kick, so dinner is chicken and broccoli." Ursula groans in disgust.

Just passed 500 followers on the Noah’s Archipelago Facebook page. Ursula isn’t too impressed, however. Share on FacebookPost on XSave

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January 9, 2023: The Hazards of Sneezes

January 12, 2023January 9, 2023 by Pyra Draculea

Adam and Duke are sitting on the couch playing video games and Ursula comes up and pokes Duke in the arm, saying, "Psst... Girls get pregnant when a boy sneezes on them, right?" Adam laughs and says "Who told you that?" Ursula replies, "Jenny says her mom's pregnant because her dad sneezed." Adam grins and asks, "Jenny's flunking science, isn't she?" Ursula says "Yeah..." then, confused, adds, "Wait, how'd you know that?" Adam replies, "Magic." Ursula then tells her brothers, "Anyway there's this runny-nosed kid Tommy who's always sneezing and—" Duke cuts her off and tells her, "You can't get pregnant from sneezes." Adam pipes up with, "Cooties, however..."

Ursula goes to Adam and Duke with the latest schoolyard scoop. Share on FacebookPost on XSave

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January 7, 2023: Comparing Notes

January 12, 2023January 7, 2023 by Pyra Draculea

Adam and his girlfriend Stacey are sitting on mismatched throne chairs in their living room, each looking exhausted and sitting with their feet up on an ottoman and drinking a beer. Stacey asks Adam, "How's your mom?" Adam replies, "Guilt-trippy and baby crazy." Stacey says, "Same old same old, then. And your dad?" "Telling me how many kids and ex-wives he had at my age. What's your mom been up to?" Stacey tells him "Plastering the walls of the shop with pics of wedding dresses." "As one does on a Saturday afternoon," Adam answers.

Nice to see that Stacey and Adam‘s moms have something in common. Share on FacebookPost on XSave

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January 6, 2023: Gigi’s Baby Crazy

January 12, 2023January 6, 2023 by Pyra Draculea

Adam's mother Gigi is sitting at a table with Adam, Noah, and her boyfriend Glen. Gigi is holding baby Valerie and cooing at her: "Aww... look at you! I remember when your big brother was as widdle as you!" Glen smiles and says, "Ya, they're cute when they're that tiny." Noah proudly (and narcisisstically) pipes up, saying, "And she's got great genetics!" Glen grins and replies, "Ya, from Ruth." Noah scowls and growls, while Gigi looks at Adam and asks, "Adam, when are you and Stacey gonna start having wee ones?" Adam winces and stammers, "Um... well... you're too young to be a granny, Ma..."

Way to put Adam on the spot, Gigi. Share on FacebookPost on XSave

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January 5, 2023: Ursula’s Resolutions

January 5, 2023January 5, 2023 by Pyra Draculea

Ursula's teacher, Miss Fardemar, is standing in front of the class with "New Year's Resolutions" written on the board behind her. She asks, "So who has a New Year's resolution they'd like to share?" Ursula has her hand up and is waving it, and Miss Fardemar calls on her: "Ursula?" Ursula says, "Watch more cartoons and do less homework!" Miss Fardemar replies, "Well, you have to do the homework I assign." Ursula retorts, "Not if you make a resolution to stop assigning it."

Nice try, Ursula. Swing and a miss, but nice try. Share on FacebookPost on XSave

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January 4, 2023: The TC10K

January 5, 2023January 4, 2023 by Pyra Draculea

Ruth and Noah are in the kitchen and she tells him, "I'm doing the TC10K run this year." Noah grins and replies, "Fantastic!" as he fetches some Koolaid from the fridge. Ruth continues, "Ursula's too little for it, but you could run it with me." Still grinning, Noah looks down at his glass and tells her, "Naw, I prefer yoga and rowing." Not giving up, Ruth squeezes Noah's shoulder and says, "I think the run will be good for you. My dad's doing the TC10K this year, too." Noah raises his eyebrows and replies, "Oh? Did Agnes tell him that yet?" Ruth crosses her arms and squirms: "Um..." Noah continues, "Is she running it with him?" Ruth looks uncomfortable and says, "Well... no... Mom has a bum knee. She'll meet him at the finish line." To which Noah replies, "Yeah... me and the girls will meet you at the finish line with Agnes and her bum knee."

No, Noah, Frank has not been informed of his participation in the TC10K yet. The TC10K is a run/walk race for charity held in Victoria, BC. I’m kinda thinking I might sign up for it this year, actually. I’ll be in the back with the slow walkers, lol… Share on FacebookPost on XSave

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